Secret Things #7: Education

March 2, 2014 - Week 12

I'm all about being educated about various things. Learning things, knowing things, preparing yourself for things... It's all good. You don't know that word? Look it up in a dictionary [online or otherwise]. You don't understand that issue? Research its origins, familiarize yourself with opposing opinions.You don't know whether an owl's face really is like a giant ear? Do some light owl reading [and supplement it with Ze Frank's questionable factoids]. You don't know what to expect when it comes to this scary, unfamiliar thing called pregnancy? Google it!

Oh wait. No. Don't do that. It's a terrible, terrible idea.

Yes, I realize there is a ton of good, helpful information out there. But, let's be real. It's the internet. And the internet can be such a cesspool of negativity, horror stories, and contradicting "expert" advice. Being the overly imaginative, what-if scenario type of person that I already am, I need no help in coming up with reasons to freak out. Does a twinge in my left side have a significant meaning? If I'm no longer feeling as hungry, does this mean I'm no longer pregnant? Will I have squashed the baby if I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm sleeping on my stomach? If I haven't gained any weight whatsoever, does that mean my baby isn't growing?

So many questions. So many variables. So many unknowns.

But, I have reached a decision. No more interneting of symptoms. No more googling of what ifs. No more wasting time wondering if that random person's experience is something I should be concerned about as well. Pregnancy seems to be different for everyone. Imagining the worst changes nothing. These are facts. I like facts. I must remember these facts.

It sounds illogical, but I am choosing to remain minimally educated. For my sanity, it seems like the most logical thing to do. Ironic.

BUT. Back to the aforementioned owl education, and other random, non-pregnancy-related, life education. Jason and I have started the training of the little kpluBlet, as education can never start too soon! Whether the topic is about sports or animals or school subjects or holidays, I find it immensely entertaining to hear Jason expound about Life to the kpluBlet in such a matter-of-fact-way. One particular description that I enjoyed was how a giraffe is "like a dog and an ostrich put together." Another tidbit worth mentioning [despite its unsurprising nature] is how "Math is good. We like math." Jason is going to be an incredible dad. I can feel it in my bones.

Who knew a tiny little lime-sized person could begin its trek to brilliance so early?

Dear Tiny Little Half-Asian kpluBlet,

Obviously, we are going to have to re-explain the world to you all over again once you're capable of comprehension and aren't just floating around in a sea of vibrations from our voices. Obviously. But you have no idea how exciting that prospect is to us.

The way you see and experience and learn about the world will be completely unique to you. It's a fascinating place. I can't wait to rediscover things with you. We will gurgle at each other. We will munch on our fists together. We will be the captive audience for your daddy's stories of Spike and Chewy. We will have educational adventures galore! Just you wait.

And just so you know, I personally think it's a disservice to the giraffe to be imagined as a dogstrich. I'll let you draw your own conclusions when you arrive.