12.02.2014

milk army

Having a tiny person apparently interferes with blogging time. I have zero regrets, however.

To summarize the past 2-1/2 months [wow, how has it already been that long and, also, how in the world has it only been 2-1/2 months?!], there have been hours upon hours of diaper changes and nursing and dark room pacing and Away in a Manger humming. It has flown by and also crawled by. Each day is a lot like the last and often it is hard to keep track of what day of the month it is or even what day of the week it is. Days and dates don't matter much anymore as Lucas doesn't care for such things. Every day is a weekend filled with diapers and milk and naps. Lucas has quite the easy life, even if he isn't aware of it.

It is still a bit weird to me how each day feels completely filled but then at the end of the day I can't think of anything significant that I've accomplished, other than keeping a tiny person alive and semi-satisfied with life. Ah. Life is exactly how I have always imagined it.

Growing a person inside of me was neat. It was pretty crazy feeling this thing get bigger and bigger as each week passed. But, for all I knew, it could have just as well been the consumption of an odd burrito at week 17. And at week 22, it could have just been a schizophrenic goldfish. And at week 27, it could have just been a disturbingly large tumor. And at week 34, it could have just been an angry alien that had somehow been implanted inside of my stomach... Ok, fine, I knew it really wasn't any of those things. I knew it was a baby growing inside of me, but the ridiculous part of me insisted that I couldn't really know until he decided to poke his head out [literally].

But what is possibly even neater than growing a person inside of me is growing a person outside of me. Seriously. It is fascinating. This boy o' mine just had his 2-month checkup and he was a shade over 2 feet and weighed nearly 15.5 pounds. Now, here's the simple math: He was born a little over 7.5 pounds, so he is twice as fat now [I use the fat description in the absolute most loving/adoring/proud way, promise]. And the only thing this boy has consumed to make 7.5 pounds more of person is milk. And I am the milk factory. I eat things. I make milk. He drinks the milk. And he grows more person. He gets fatter. He gets longer. He gets more little-person-like. All from milk. This shouldn't seem weird or surprising, but it is endlessly fascinating to me. My brain equates it to a groundbreaking perpetual motion machine or some miraculous scientific discovery. We could make an entire army from MILK. People, a milk army. I have the proof, the prototype - he is slurping away the remnants of his last milk infusion [from his fists no less] at my feet at this very moment.

Each week brings something new with this kid. I would venture to say something new happens each day, but like I mentioned earlier, most weeks feel like one giant day and it is hard to differentiate between Things That Occurred Today and Things That Seemed to Have Occurred Today. The past week and a half or so has brought on voluntary smiling and giggling. It is pretty much the best thing in the world. I don't mean a lucky smile that you happen to catch on his face or a small upturned mouth kind of smile. I mean a giant, mouth wide open, eyes crinkling, head thrown back kind of smile that I can cause almost on demand [as long as he isn't cranky]. It makes my insides feel like exploding and all I can think about is how much I love, love, love being a mom.

I won't deny it - life is definitely still all about Lucas these days. But we do have other exciting things going on as well that shouldn't be overlooked. For instance, Jason has applied for nearly 60 faculty positions at schools in an entertaining geographic distribution. And the annual Christmas tree chopping adventure will be happening soon. The tiniest of lumberjacks will be accompanying us this year but, sadly, infant-sized hatchets are either not manufactured or greatly frowned upon in the US as we cannot find one. Thanksgiving was delicious as usual, and my mashed potatoes were appropriately mushroom-gravy-ed up. We had our first snow of the season, though it didn't last very long and was not epic enough to warrant bringing Lucas out. And lastly, tonight we are partying it up hard with some Red Robin as today marked Jason's last teaching day of the semester. Woop! He is such an amazing husband and daddy, I can't even begin to give him enough credit and gratitude. He is, hands down, the greatest thing on two legs.

Life is grand and sleepy and pee-filled. I couldn't ask for more. God is good.

Love. Exploding. Everywhere.