9.27.2021

the incident

The weather has been beautiful lately. The boys have been absolutely loving getting outside and running about like mad. The humidity disappearing has been a real game changer and I am trying to take advantage of every single opportunity to get all of us outside before the fall weather abruptly disappears.

One of my favorite things is watching Lucas and Finley and Sebastian running after each other down the sidewalk while I follow behind with the stroller and a gleefully kicky baby. Lucas is in a constant state of adventure and imagination. Finley is the ever dutiful follower, until he's distracted by his own imaginations and falls so far behind that he is convinced there is no way he can possibly catch up. Sebastian is fully embracing life as one of the big kids and often gets drunk with his newfound freedom, often resulting in knee scrapes upon knee scrapes while he does his best to keep up with his longer-legged brothers. Eli is pleased to have enough torso and neck strength that he can ride in the regular stroller seat instead of his car seat for our walks. I love these moments. 

Getting ready for today's walk was a bit more eventful than usual, and a lot more eventful than I cared for. Get your judgement ready - I deserve it. Also get your Thank the Lord hands ready - He deserves it.

Lucas and Finley were playing in the driveway while I got Eli and Sebastian into the stroller. Once I had strapped Eli in, I remembered I wanted to get a toy for him to chew on. So, I locked the wheels of the stroller and walked back into the garage to retrieve the toy that was hooked on the single stroller we had used the day before. 

I suppose this is where I say I thought I had locked the wheels.

And you can now guess where this story is going.

Our stroller's back wheels lock together. There is a pedal on each side, but generally if you press one down, it pushes the other side down pretty effectively and the wheels are locked in place. Weird Detail #1: I distinctly remember securely locking the left side, but I also distinctly remember not putting much thought or effort into making sure the right side had firmly locked. It always feels redundant, and 199 times out of 200, it is. But then there's that one time...

Our driveway doesn't look particularly sloped, but it actually is extremely effective as a ramp for Things Prone to Rolling, as many games of "Catch that ball/truck/frisbee/boy before it rolls into the street!" have proven. Spoiler: I suppose I shall now have to add "stroller" to the list of things that have gone pell-mell down our deceptively not-flat driveway.

I was at the back of the garage untangling plastic toy links when I heard Lucas and Finley start laughing and giggling like crazy. Thankful #1: I actually turned to look, wanting to see what kind of fun they were having. There are many times I do not turn to see what is causing the laughter. If I had not turned and seen the stroller picking up speed down the driveway, the situation would have probably ended up much worse. [Now, why my 7-year-old and 4-year-old thought "this is a funny thing that is happening" instead of "this is a dangerous thing that is happening" is a whole other issue... multiple conversations and lessons for the future occurred throughout the rest of the day, you can be sure.]

So, I heard the laughter, I saw the careening stroller, and I took off at a dead sprint [yes, I am an excellent flip-flop-wearing sprinter]. There was no chance of me reaching the stroller before it went over the curb and into the street, and in those moments all I could think was, "Oh please don't tip, please don't tip over." Weird Detail #2: I didn't even once think, "Oh please don't let a car be coming." Thankful #2: The stroller bumped off the driveway, into the street, and did not tip over. I do not know how it did not tip going at the speed it was, at the angle it went off the driveway, at the completely uncontrolled nature of the rolling. Shout out to God's Undeserved Grace and the resilience and balance of our Joovy stroller. Thankful #3: No moving car was in sight. Weird Detail #3:  I noticed Sebastian looking backwards at me and I wanted to tell him to put his head back "inside" the stroller and to look forward so he could watch where he was going. Weird Detail #4: When I saw his face looking back at me, I thought, "I wonder if he's having fun." 

Our neighbors across the street were getting some lawn work done, so there was a truck and trailer parked in front of their house. The stroller was on a collision course with the side of the truck. I had a split second to relish the almost tangible relief from the stroller not tipping going off the driveway before I was filled with the next potential horror of the stroller smashing into the truck at an angle and tipping on contact. Thankful #4: I caught the stroller about two feet away from the side of the truck. Weird Detail #5: It felt like I took 2 strides to cover the distance from the bottom of our driveway to almost the other side of the street. This is surely impossible for my Korean legs, but that is what my brain registered. Stride, stride, catch. 

The boys were unscathed and unfazed. Eli was chilling, chewing on his hands. Sebi was telling me he wanted to go in the opposite direction [he had already requested to be that morning's "navigator" and was not pleased that the walk had apparently started in the wrong direction]. As I quickly pushed the stroller back into our driveway, I was overwhelmed with so many feelings and emotions: the fading edges of panic, the anxious "what if's," the anger at my neglect, the misplaced frustration towards my older two for not being more responsible in their reactions. But far and away the strongest emotion that crowded out all of the others was the absolute relief. It was like I had been holding my breath and I could finally breathe again. I am sure this all sounds melodramatic and perhaps not like a big deal, especially since everything came out okay in the end, but in the moment, it was a take-a-few-years-off-my-life blur of happenings. Do not care to repeat.

Thankful #5: Lucas. Finley. Sebastian. Eli.
Thankful #6: Beautiful days for beautiful walks [though, from here on out, I prefer less exciting beginnings, thank you very much] 
Thankful #7: Everything God.

Weird Detail #6: I felt a pretty substantial amount of relief that no neighbors were outside to witness my embarrassing failure as a parent.

So there you have it. To sum up my takeaways:

  • I will always double check the wheel locks on the stroller.
  • I no longer feel the need to justify my shoe choice to anyone.
  • If Sebi and Eli become adrenaline junkies, I will know why.
  • My star rating of our Joovy has increased from a 9/10 to a 13/10. Would buy again [but thankfully I do not need to as I did not smash up this one this morning].
  • Oh my gravy.
The walk following this heart gripping incident was pleasantly boring and I have zero complaints about this.

9.20.2021

fortuitous mustarding

The following story is 100% true and gives an extremely accurate glimpse into how we live life within the four walls of our home. Prepare yourselves.

Being both a doting wife and a culinary master, I was in the process of creating an elaborate lunch for Jason to take to work [read: turkey and cheese sandwich] and I needed to open a new mustard bottle. I took off the cap so I could remove the protective seal, twisted the cap back on, gave the bottle a quick shake [because no one wants that thin mustard juice from the top of a new mustard to be dripped onto their sandwich], and then popped open the cap. I have successfully performed this process with many a mustard bottle. 

But today, when the cap popped open, it exploded globs of mustard every which way. One glob landed on the slice of bread, one splatted on the floor, and one daintily plopped on my arm. While Sebastian [my ever present kitchen assistant (who is unashamedly there for the sole purpose of sneaking bites of things)] laughed at me and exclaimed "Uh-oh!" repeatedly, I cleaned up the floor splat, took a picture of the amusing situation, swiped the arm mustard onto my knife, and smeared the arm mustard onto the bread. I then called to Jason in the other room and asked, "Do you mind if I still use the mustard from my arm on your sandwich?" His answer was prompt and unsurprising: "I don't care. It's fine with me." 

And that, my friends, is reason #4,831 why Jason and I are soulmates [and reason #390 why we do not host parties].